Day 28: Something That Stresses Me Out

I'm easily overwhelmed. I have to be careful not to take on too large of a workload, or I will inevitable reach such a high level of stress that I fall into depression.

Right now I kind of feel like this is making me look like I'm an underachiever. I'm not in the honors college. I don't have a job. I'm not double majoring (anymore) or doing a minor.

I know that I'm mentally capable of doing this stuff, but I also know that I don't have the emotional fortitude for it.

I see some of my friends somehow managing to balance heavy classloads, part- to full-time jobs, and busy social lives. Color me flabbergasted. I don't know how they do it. Just thinking about it makes me want to go do something mindless.

Perhaps I'm just bad at time and stress management, but what do I do? The more activity life demands of me, the more I counter it with relaxation. For example, for the past three semesters I have spent finals week watching marathons of various TV shows. And I mean marathons. Fall 2009 may or may not have been the webshow Dorm Life. Spring 2010 was most of the first season of Lost. Fall 2010 was four seasons of Psych.

The past few weeks have been testing my limits in a new way. I don't think I've ever socialized as much. I'm used to having my weekends to just chill. This past Saturday I just had to sleep in and recover after being invited to activity after activity, meaning that I had to skip the Renaissance Festival yet again. This makes it more than two years since I've been to one. What a dismal thought. Don't misunderstand me. I love that I have friends and that they want to do things with me, but recent events have just confirmed to me what I have always thought: I'm a homebody. This out-and-aboutness tires me out fast. I can't sustain it over a long period of time. I marvel at people who can. I don't think that it will ever be for me, not really. I am a creature meant for quieter pursuits.

Listening to: "Burgess Kills/Captain & Ship" from Firefly (Original Television Soundtrack)
Reading: Persuasion by Jane Austen